There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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