Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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