my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
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remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
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I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Ladies don't puke and tell
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.