Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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