Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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