ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I had to cum in my sink.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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