this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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