I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
