I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
