If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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