what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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