Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
