is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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