Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
