i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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