I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize