We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
