my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I will pee on everything he values.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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