More tranny stories later!
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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