I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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