Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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