yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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