i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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