his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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