So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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