Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
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Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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