He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
