I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My liver just had a heart attack.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize