Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
being pregnant is like rehab
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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