Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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