Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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