I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
