im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
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He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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