My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize