you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
