I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
