i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
