I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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