Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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