Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
