there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
