remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize