i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
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Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Princesses don't give blow jobs
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
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I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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