Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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