awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Randomize
