So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
