You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
please don't ironically join a cult
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