Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
my mouth tastes like poor choices
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
