So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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