yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
